


Come On And Break Me

by amanda_jolene



Series: Punk Rae [6]
Category: My Mad Fat Diary
Genre: F/M, Gen, brief mentions of drug use
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-14
Updated: 2014-04-14
Packaged: 2018-01-19 09:23:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,963
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1464127
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amanda_jolene/pseuds/amanda_jolene
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Even tough girls have feelings.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Come On And Break Me

They’re official. 

Well, officially official. 

Finn figures he’s been hers since the first time he ever saw her and she’s been his (complete and utterly) since the tattoo shop. They’ve kissed in the halls, made love on every piece of furniture in her house (they’re working on his now), but he knows all of it is real the first time she says, “This is my boyfriend” when introducing him to her friend at the record shop (he beamed like a fucking lamp without a shade and she called him a dork). 

He didn’t waste any time in calling her his girlfriend. The word was like sugar on his tongue and he couldn’t help himself, couldn’t even be embarrassed when Archie rolled his eyes and said, “Yeah. Rae, your girlfriend. Your girlfriend, Rae. I get it, Finn.”

Not everyone could believe they were dating, though, and while no one said anything to their faces (he wasn’t sure if they were afraid of him punching them or Rae’s killer headbutt) he could hear the whispers behind them. “He’s with her? She’s with him?” It didn’t faze her at all but it was an annoying buzz in the back of his brain because sometimes he wondered what she saw in him, too. Finn knew he was a good looking lad, knew he had girls lined up if he wanted them but all he wanted was Rae. 

It was worse around her friends because there was a rift between them now. There were a few (mostly Liam’s friends) who thought Finn needed to piss off and the others were vaguely indifferent to his sudden inclusion in their group. They all skirt around him, though, keep him at arm’s length and ignoring him in all ways possible. For a moment, he thinks he’s made friends with one of the boys after they have a lengthy discussion about music but when Finn wears his Grunge is Dead shirt the next day, the lad gives him a disgusted look and says, “What would someone like you know about grunge?” 

He’s got Archie to stick with him during the lunch break and they stand there and shift awkwardly when her friends pass little mint tins full of pills around and spout of facts about how much valium and X they can take together. Finn’s relieved when Rae shakes her head in disgust and mutters “Idiots.” 

It surprises him when she asks him to go to one of her friend’s parties. They’ve been together for almost three months and she’s never shown any interest in hanging with those twats outside of school but here she was, wanting them to skip the pub and go to someone’s house (the blokes name was Lash and Finn couldn’t help the disbelief that overcame his face) for a party. What the hell kind of party did those people have? Piercing parties? He’s sweating it out but he manages a smile. “Yeah, sure. Ok.” 

“I know it’s kind of odd but it’s for Marcy’s birthday and… I guess I’ve sort of been distant with them since we’ve been dating.” 

He knows she’s not blaming him but he reckons she should. Finn would never try to alienate her from her friends, but he and Archie both agreed that maybe keeping her away from them might be a good idea. Neither of the boys told her to stay away, they just always asked to her to hang around with them because as much as her college mates couldn’t imagine her being with Finn or hanging out with Archie, they couldn’t imagine her (Punk Rock Rae with her tough exterior and sweet as pie demeanor) hanging out with kids who shoved sewing needles through body parts and popped pills without knowing what they were. 

He would be on his own this time because he was pretty sure there would be a small scale riot if he tried to sneak Archie in (he was pretty sure they would riot about him if they weren’t afraid of a beat down like Liam had received). 

“We don’t have to stay long,” she tells him, kissing him on the cheek. 

He wonders if a hi and bye is long enough. 

Finn’s supposed to pick her up at 7. She said they’d stay an hour at most and then bail out to the pub (or the backseat of Finn’s car, whichever he preferred, she had told him with a sly smile). An hour was way longer than he anticipated (anything could happen in an hour!) but he had put on a smile and said “Yeah, sure. Ok.” (That was quickly becoming his go to phrase when it came to her friends). 

But 10 minutes into the party, the birthday girl is crying and running upstairs and Finn thinks it’s the perfect time to leave but another girl gets Rae by the sleeve and hauls her upstairs, too. 

Which leaves him on the couch with some kid with blue hair and the guy who was getting his dick pierced the first time Finn told Rae he loved her. He doesn’t try to make small talk but the blue haired guy’s head sort of slumps (Finn had watched him toss a handful of pills into his mouth moments earlier) and he says “Girls, man. Girls.” 

“Yeah.” 

Twenty minutes later, she’s still not back and the blue haired guy is passed out and he’s pretty sure the dick piercing guy keeps hitting on him. When the guy touches his leg, Finn bolts and heads up the stairs, determined to find Rae and get the fuck out because he had done the boyfriend thing and hung out with her weird friends and now it was time to be with their mutual friends. He’s not sure where she’s at and he’s about to start opening random door when the bathroom door opens and out walks the crying birthday girl. But she’s not crying anymore. In fact, she’s got a glazed and dazed look and she wipes her nose on her sleeve when she passes him.

The other girl files out, same look and then comes Liam, wobbling a little. His nose is crooked now and he’s still got a black eye but he smiles at Finn and mumbles “Party hard, pretty boy.”

Rae is the last one out. She puts the door behind her and tries to give him a smile, but he’s not having it. “I’m leaving.”

She looks taken aback by the bite in his tone. “Ok?”

He’s angry with her and he’s not sure why. It’s her body and she was the right to do what she wants and ingest what she wants but the thought of Rae… of his Rae doing drugs makes him feel violently ill. He can’t face her, can’t look her in the eye so he just turns and heads down the stairs, not waiting to see if she was going to follow him. He’s almost to the car when he hears her call his name.

She throws up her hands. “What the fuck? Were just going to leave me?”

“Didn’t know if you were coming,” he mumbles, sliding into the driver’s seat.

He tries to pretend he doesn’t notice the look she’s giving him when she gets in and he doesn’t say anything when he starts the car. In fact, they are pretty much silent until they are parked behind the pub. 

“Are you on your period?” She tries to joke.

“Are you doing drugs?” He bites back.

Her head snaps back. “Excuse me?”

“Did you do coke with the rest of them? Why were you gone so long? Why were you in there with Liam?”

“Jesus Christ, Finn! What, are you my mother?” Her face is red and he knows he’s made a mistake. He should have kept his mouth shut or at least confronted her a bit softer. “You don’t have the right to question me on these things, especially not in that tone!”

“I do have the right when you leave me alone with your freak friends!”

“Freak… freak friends?” She splutters. “In case you haven’t noticed, I am one of those freaks. You think I don’t know what your little admirers say about me at college? You think I don’t notice that your friends look at me and think you must have lost your mind?” She turns away from him and demands “Take me home.”

He’s sorry now. Really sorry because he had forgotten that under all the lace and nylon and attitude, she was a very soft, delicate girl. Just because she didn’t let on that people hurt her doesn’t mean they don’t and his heart starts crumbling when she brushes tears away. “Rae-“

“Forget it.” She slams the car door open and is a good bit away from him before he comes to his senses and scrambles after her.

“Rae, wait! I’m sorry, ok?”

She wheels around to face him and he’s running so fast after her that he doesn’t have time to stop and crashes right into her. They stumble back and he grabs her shoulders to steady her but her temper is flaring and she pushes him back. His heel catches a crack in the sidewalk and he lands with a painful thud. “Let me tell you something, Finn Nelson. My body is not your business and what I put into my body is not your business, either. But just for the sake of conversation, let’s say it was. Then the answers to your totally off the wall questions would go as follows: I did not do coke with them. I was gone so long because I didn’t want them to be fucked up and in the same space as Liam unprotected which also answers your third question. As for my freak friends…” she trails off, biting her bottom lip. “No, they aren’t perfect but for a long time, they were all I had. So don’t think I don’t know what game you and Archie are playing. And… and… don’t think I don’t appreciate the sentiment because I do.” She offers him a hand and he’s almost reluctant to take it because he can just imagine him being the next on her headbutt list. “Come on now.”

She helps him to his feet and dusts him off. “I’m sorry I got mad. You’re right, I don’t have the-“

“No, no,” she shakes her head. “I know you don’t mean anything by it. I’m just not used to having someone… care about me, I guess.”

“Well, I do and so does Archie, you know. I’m not trying to keep you from your friends they’re just…”

“Burnouts and drug dealers and fighters, I know. I guess I don’t fit in with them except for the dress,” she motions to her lace skirt and band tee. “But they gave me somewhere to fit in, you know?”

“You fit in with me,” he offers. “We don’t dress much alike and my music taste is a bit better than-“

“You better not finish that.”

“Right.” 

He waits for her to take his hand this time and waits for her to kiss him because he wants to make sure he’s not forcing himself on her if she’s still mad. “Can I ask you for a favor?” 

She narrows her eyes in a playful way. “Depends on what it is, I s’pose.”

“Think we can have a chat? Maybe about why you… don’t feel like anyone cares about you?”

The look she gives him is guarded and she pulls into herself so visibly that Finn has to reach out and touch her just to make sure she’s still with him. “Kind of hard to explain.”

“I got time.” He smiles when she takes his hand. “I’ve always got time for you.”


End file.
